Communication s one of the most identified problems in a relationship. I believe the real problem is listening or more importantly hearing what the other person said. In Anger Management it is suggested that a person waits five seconds after a person completes their statement before they respond. The reasoning is that you respond to the complete thought rather than the first part. Once you determine what you are going to say you stop hearing what is being said. For example if someone says, " I was very disappointed in your comment until I realized you were trying to help me." If a person became defensive about the disappointment they would miss the true meaning of the statement.

The idea of communication is to develop understanding which means hearing what is being said, not just listening to the words.